The spiritual warfare is abundant. Many nights of only a few hours of sleep, and then nights like last night. Only an hour or so of sleep, but during those moments of “almost” sleep or “almost” waking you hear a encouragement.

Words that fill you with strength and so much hope you’re sure you can tackle anything. Then by the time you’re fully awake you can only remember a few words or phrases, and that niggling voice starts to tell you, You’re just pretending to be whatever it is you think you are.

Give up, it’s all in your head, none of it’s real, you aren’t doing anything right, you just sound like an idiot. Then you watch a video, or read a post, and like a flood those words you heard come back to you. And you completely understand them, all because a brother or sister posted almost the same thing you heard.

I have wept tears of joy, and tears of sorrow for just this reason. I don’t understand it, though I’m trying hard to, and like brother Sean said, just sitting in His presence truly helps. I again only remember a few words from last night, but I’ll cling to the feeling of strength that I got from them until it’s time for me to fully understand. I know no one else would understand this, and I’m so thankful that I have a place full of those that do❤️.

I hope everyone has a very great day, and I didn’t confuse y’all too much ????. It’s just the 4-5 day straight now, and I confess: I’m afraid because I don’t understand, and that I might not be doing something I’m supposed to. Then with me being so worried, that is letting the enemy taunt me?? I don’t know. Sorry it’s so long, know I love everyone and pray for each of you❤️❤️❤️❤️